Stop! Easy. Quiet. Listen. Don't rush. I want to tell you a story that needs you to close your eyes. It's the whole vibe. Trust me. I guess theories are oftentimes over-hyped. And this story could seem like a mathematical asymptote. But effort, sure as hell, never betrays. So stay with me. A mysterious man remotely hijacks a self-driving car. The occupant of the car is British Home Secretary Eva Simon. In London, this is the story making the rounds. It's in the Tabloids and in Newsweek. The occupant's still missing. But surveillance cameras had captured the footage, even as the assailant wrote QUEEN NEFERTITI on the windshield.
Open your eyes.
Believe me, it takes a whole lot of intelligence to hijack a self-driving car. And an ounce of hard work also to pull that off even. So whoever did this is a genius. And this is in no way a sort of attempt to negate the severity of the offense at hand. Eva Simon was meant to return to Emerald Suites where she was supposed to meet the prime minister Andrew Floorgates.
But this happened, and the prime minister had to wait. The reason why there is this mouth-watering bounty for whoever finds Eva Simon or the other one. Let's reach a logical conclusion here, but very slowly. Eva Simon did not press the distress button in the car, and must have planned her own kidnap. Two, the assailant may have stopped her attempt at SOS. But whichever was the case, the news world is burning with questions and the fiery "What-ifs". The very reason Tim Bolt has started running a new TV program titled "Almost Home".
And the reason why Mary Jane 1 is running a paper column titled "Who's Queen Nefertiti Apart From the Nefertiti?" Frankly, the cameras' capture hasn't in any way helped to ascertain who this interesting assailant may be. Because, of course, he was wearing a balaclava and purple gauntlets. And no one knows for sure if Eva Simon has ever crossed paths with this unidentified adversary, and if it's even a case of betrayal by association.
The only thing that was left on the ground where the very hijacking took place was nothing at all. So, in reality, this kidnapper had left no trail – a perfect case of meticulous undertaking. First of all, which may be right, you don't know Eva Simon really. Simon's everyone's favourite politician – beautiful, buxom, soft-spoken, intelligent. So everyone's outright guess, albeit disturbing, was that she was probably kidnapped on the basis of her jaw-dropping pulchritude.
That fateful day, she was wearing blue travelling pants her ex-husband bought for a whopping four thousand pounds at a Givenchy first-rate production store. She wore this with her white polka dot top and left 10 Downing Street. It was a cold morning. The car was a custom-made car, expensive as the depths of the ocean.
When she entered, she dropped her Gucci bag and called Customer Care at Fifi and Finnigans, telling them she would drop by to pick her supplies of house utilities. Then she whispered to the car, "Please, take me to F145 Queens Avenue." The car answered in excited fashion and revved off, dodging omnipresent obstacles as it raced in search of Queens Avenue. But what Eva Simons didn't know was that a purple Mercedes was following behind.
At exactly half-past one, the purple Mercedes hit the self-driving car into an alley. And quickly came the assailant to take control of the limousine, leaving his armoured SUV. This is where the story gets interesting. First, there seemed to be a delay as the assailant came out, wrote something on the windshield, and tried to pull the limousine to the road again. But yet, Eva Simon did not make any attempt to escape, was subdued by the assailant, or was bothered about the consequences of such an attempt. Nothing is clear, but the surveillance cameras showed the limousine slowly finding the road again till it became a tiny spectre and vanishing from line of vision.
Another theory now, though on few fearless mouths, is that Andrew Floorgates is responsible for the kidnap of British Home Secretary Eva Simon. Now security operatives are demanding his arrest. The embarrassed prime minister has given a speech decrying the recent allegations. But like magnets on windowpanes, it stuck. And the reason why there is a global outcry demanding the resignation of the prime minister if Eva Simon was not found in seven working days. "That's bullshit!" the prime minister said. "Eva Simon's someone I can hardly stop thinking about. I have great admiration for her. I do not see reasons why I should hamper that relationship." But again, another meaning was read into this and people blabbed about them having an affair. Soon, Andrew Floorgates was arrested and detained.
But before it was seventy-two hours, the self-driving car was found racing back towards Downing Street. And when Eva Simon was asked what transpired, she said:
"Nothing much, except that the assailant needed the expensive blue pants of mine. I guess I just had to dish it to him to be free. It's simply the strangest thing I have ever seen someone risk his life for. Perhaps, times have changed. And, of course, I couldn't have him arrested because I was the hostage. These are troubling times. Free Andrew Floorgates. He knows nothing about the Brotherhood of the Blue Traveling Pants."
Then weeks passed. But again, The Newsweek wrote: Times have changed, but pants have not. We are worried Eva Simon still wears blue pants. And what, if any, shall separate her from the love of blue? Andrew or Adieu? And who would be next? Time shall tell. It's supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.
Bio:
Marvel Chukwudi Pephel, also known as Poet Panda, is a Nigerian biochemist, writer and poet. He has contributed research papers to the field of Biochemistry as Nwachukwu Godslove Pephel. As a poet, Pephel's work explores themes of love, life, nature, and social issues, with a unique blend of creativity and scientific insight. His poetry is characterized by its lyrical style, depth, and emotional resonance. His work is a testament to the intersection of art and science. He is a fan of the surrealist painter Salvador Dali, and writers Helen Oyeyemi, Ray Bradbury, Irving Washington, Edgar Allan Poe, Frank G. Slaughter and Philip K. Dick. He calculates what he calls "Creative Functions", an experimental but effective way of writing short story endings before their beginnings.